you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Fuck me I smell like cheese
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
