5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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