it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
