It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
