Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
