All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
