i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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