WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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