do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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