He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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