I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
