its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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