I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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