im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Randomize
