you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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