Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
This baby is an asshole
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
