she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
