So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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