sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
