apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
it's like heaven, but drunker
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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