Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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