You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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