I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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