Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
