i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize