so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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