We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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