U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
