and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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