puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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