9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
