i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize
