OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Randomize