Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Randomize
