I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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