i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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