the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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