Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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