Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
