so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
