Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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