i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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