He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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