I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Its about making memories worth repressing
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize