Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
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