You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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