she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
