I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
