I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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