my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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